Writing an obituary is one of the most important tasks you’ll face after losing a loved one. It’s an opportunity to reflect on their life, celebrate their achievements, and share their legacy with the world. However, the process can be overwhelming, especially when you’re dealing with grief. This guide will walk you through the top 10 tips for writing an obituary that truly reflects a life well-lived, ensuring that your loved one’s story is told with the care and respect it deserves.
1. Start with the Basics
The foundation of any obituary is the essential details about the deceased. This includes their full name, age, date of birth, date of death, and place of residence. Starting with these basics provides a clear and concise introduction to the obituary and sets the stage for the more personal elements that follow.
Example: John Michael Doe, 76, of Springfield, passed away peacefully on August 4, 2024, surrounded by his loving family.
2. Highlight Major Life Events
An obituary should offer a snapshot of the deceased’s life, highlighting major milestones such as education, career, marriage, and other significant achievements. This helps to paint a fuller picture of their life and allows readers to understand the key moments that defined them. Writing an obituary may seem a daunting task, but not to fret. Taking a little time to reflect on their major life events can really help
Example: John was born on January 15, 1948, in Springfield. He graduated from Springfield High School and went on to earn a degree in engineering from the University of Illinois. John married his high school sweetheart, Mary, in 1970, and together they raised three children.
3. Celebrate Their Passions and Interests
One of the most powerful ways to personalize an obituary is by including details about the deceased’s passions, hobbies, and interests. Whether they were an avid gardener, a dedicated volunteer, or a lover of the arts, these details help to bring the person to life on the page and show what made them unique.
Example: John had a lifelong passion for gardening, spending countless hours tending to his backyard oasis. His love for the outdoors was matched only by his dedication to his community, where he volunteered at the local food bank for over 20 years.
4. Mention Family Members
Including the names of family members is a traditional and meaningful part of an obituary. This typically includes immediate family members such as parents, siblings, spouse, children, and grandchildren. Mentioning family members not only honors those closest to the deceased but also acknowledges the family left behind.
Example: John is survived by his wife, Mary; his children, Lisa (Mark) Johnson, David (Sarah) Doe, and Kevin (Emily) Doe; his grandchildren, Emma, Olivia, and Jackson; and his sister, Susan (Tom) Green.
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5. Share Their Legacy
An obituary is an opportunity to highlight the impact the deceased had on others and the legacy they leave behind. This could include their contributions to their community, the lives they touched, or the lessons they imparted. Sharing their legacy helps to ensure that their memory lives on in the hearts and minds of those who knew them.
Example: John’s kindness and generosity knew no bounds. He was known for his willingness to help anyone in need, whether it was a neighbor down the street or a stranger in the grocery store. His legacy of compassion and service will continue to inspire all who knew him.
6. Add a Personal Touch
To make the obituary truly reflective of the deceased’s personality, consider adding a personal touch. This could be a favorite quote, a cherished memory, or even a humorous anecdote that captures their spirit. These personal touches help to create a more intimate and heartfelt tribute. This is extremely important when writing an obituary.
Example: One of John’s favorite sayings was, “Leave the world a little better than you found it.” He lived by these words every day, always looking for ways to make a positive difference in the lives of others.
7. Writing an Obituary – Consider the Tone
The tone of an obituary should reflect the personality of the deceased and the wishes of the family. While some obituaries are formal and traditional, others may be more lighthearted or even humorous. Consider what tone best represents the deceased and use it consistently throughout the obituary.
Example: John’s friends and family will remember him for his quick wit, his infectious laugh, and his ability to find joy in the simplest of moments.
8. Include Service Information
If there will be a memorial service or funeral, it’s important to include the details in the obituary. This should include the date, time, and location of the service, as well as any special requests, such as donations to a charity in lieu of flowers.
Example: A memorial service will be held on August 10, 2024, at 2:00 PM at Springfield Community Church. In lieu of flowers, the family requests that donations be made to the Springfield Food Bank in John’s honor.
9. Proofread Carefully
An obituary is a lasting tribute to a loved one, so it’s important to ensure that it is free of errors. Take the time to proofread the obituary carefully, checking for spelling, grammar, and factual accuracy. It may also be helpful to have a trusted friend or family member review it as well.
Example: Before submitting the obituary to the newspaper or online, double-check all names, dates, and details to ensure they are correct.
10. Consider a Digital Memorial
In today’s digital age, many families are choosing to create online memorials in addition to traditional obituaries. A digital memorial allows for more flexibility in sharing photos, stories, and memories, and can be easily shared with friends and family around the world.
Example: The family has also created a digital memorial for John, where friends and loved ones can share their memories and photos. Visit [website] to leave a tribute and view the memorial.
